absolutely nothing

I haven't wrote anything here for quite a long time all i do is i post pictures and just a short post just to make you clear i am feeling better but i'm not sure with it. I feel like a distant from him like there's a wall between us. I'm not sure, i don't even know am i recovering or just the same. Actually the problem is i miss him, him that guy. That guy i would go nuts at every minute, that guy... that dude. I wish i could turn back time and do what i should do and say what i was supposed to say to him. But apparently we all get the part where we can't turn back time. I pray most of the time so that i can feel that moment or see or dream. Somehow i just think that everything is slipping through my fingertips. Nothing has been right. I know i should get back on track but i don't even know what track am i ot. All i do this time is i watch everything slipping away and not doing anything about it just standing there. I feel he is slipping away, fading awa...

  As time/months passes by nothing has changed i'm still this. Nothing. I'm sorry for being such a burden dragging you around. But hey i was right you wouldn't care less about it. My life has been nothing but a piece of shit it keeps on coming keep on taking every bit of happiness i have. Every minute, every second. I stare at myself in the mirror, crying. Why can't i be like others feel completely needed by everybody. I stare and count everything i hate about myself. Trust me i don't even know who i am anymore. It keeps on haunting me, scaring the shit out of me. I'm tired of seeing how things are falling each day.How can just in one sentence just takes every bit of happiness that i had. Every bit of joy in me gone just with one sentence. I feel like ripping my self. That one sentence makes me feel unwanted, worthless, nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing. It cuts deep it hurts. I can't imagine much other things to describe how i feel. It hurts so ...