absolutely nothing

promise me you won't walk out from my life, you've become something that i've been attached on. i know we've had our tough times i know i'm just an  illusional freak keep on imagining keep on picturing that one day i won't just be waiting at your door one day you'll greet me. one day i'll be part of something you're afraid to lose. i've tried moving on, not looking at you when we bumped in but it hurts to see how happy she made you feel. how loved she made you feel. it hurts it cuts deep. it made me lose hope on this moving on thingy i prayed almost every time and hoping that one day that feeling would fade away. it breaks my heart, it like a dull knife cutting through me. but im thankful we did not end up being strangers at least i can wave at you, smile at you. the other day you made me really happy, i wanted you to say good luck but i thought you won't and you did. it was better. it felt like before, like the beginning like how you us...

jun nak tahu tak aku ada buku pasal kau. tiap tiap kali kita borak aku tulis pasal apa yang kita borak dalam buku tu. bulan yang paling buat aku gembira julai tahun lepas. banyak kenangan kan jun. ingat tak? ingat time kau nak kerja sekali dengan aku kau kata kau nak amik aku kita pergi kerja sama sama. kau bina kan rumah tepi pantai untuk aku. jun, aku tak pernah lupa tu. tapi mungkin kita main main je tapi aku suka. sangat. jun ingat lagi tak masa kau wish "goodluck trial" tapi aku masa tu baru form 2 hahah. aku nak feveret je tweet tu sebab tak lama lagi aku trial maybe boleh bagi aku semangat ke mana tahu kan. ingat lagi time kau nak belanja aku tf? tak dapat lagi tau ahaha, mungkin kau dah lupa kot. jun ingat tak time aku mintak makanan dekat kau pastu kau tak kasi haha sebab tak suka share food pastu kau ingat aku merajuk, aku plan nak masakkan kau spaghetti letak cheese banyak banyak atas tu. pastu kau nak buat roti telur je easy as 123 for me and you katanya, pastu ka...

aku tau walau takde seinci untuk aku dalam hati kau, tunggu di ambang pintu hati kau aku tau chances dia memang kosong. tapi aku tunggu bila kau jemput aku, aku tau benda tu takkan jadi tapi aku tunggu. aku sebak aku sedih sangat, perit. to see someone you love happy is the most greatest thing but to see the reason he/she is happy and we're not the reason why. sakit sangat. aku taktahu bila aku nak sangkut sampai dia dah hilang macam tu baru nak berundur. salah aku jugak. tapi kau dah macam tak kenal aku, aku seakan stranger bagi kau. aku tak nak kita jadi strangers sumpah aku cakap kalau boleh memang aku taknak tapi bila dah jadi sakit dia susah untuk aku put in to words.. i'll be here, just in case 

aku rindu kau, sangat. kau tak perasan ke?